Perplexingly Postmodern

Sometimes reading postmodern literature is like reading those texts where people just type the first words their iPhone suggests… For instance, compare the authorship of: 

1) My iPhone and that of a friend:

  

2) A revered postmodern author: 

  

Oddly similar…yet only one is deemed worthy of annotations! 

Disclaimer: I honestly do have appreciation for postmodern artistry and understand the point this particular is communicating; I simply find the lack of structure discomforting at times. Go ahead and call me old-fashioned if you wish. ūüėČ

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A Caution to Writers

Dear fellow writers,

Should you ever decide to change perspective halfway through your novel’s draft, do not use Word’s “Find and Replace” feature because otherwise when you try to change “I” (the pronoun) to your character’s name (Paige, in this instance), you might find every letter “I” replaced with her name. Oops. That Paiges a serPaigeous Paigeue. 

Sincerely,

Ryanne

ÔĽŅ

7 Steps to Overcoming a Haircut Crisis: by Rapunzel, Anne, Jo, and Me

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My face post-haircut. Goodbye braids..

“It looks so good!” gushes the stylist.

You nod vaguely, but inside you’re screaming, “Since when does ‘two inches’ mean ‘take it all’?”

You came in wanting a simple trim (freshen up the layers, cut the split-ends, the usual), but one ambitious beautician and several pairs of scissors later you’re sitting open-mouthed in a nest of¬†your own hair.

I’ve been there.

We’ve all been there.

In fact, haircuts-gone-wrong are so common that some of the most beloved characters in fiction have also been there and can offer great advice for getting over the horror of your hair disaster. So here you go, 7 Steps to Overcoming Your Hair Crisis, brought to you by some of your favorite fictional ladies:

1. Recognize that your new ‘do is…unexpected.¬†

"I just wanted a trim!"

“I just wanted a trim!”

Especially if you’ve had the same hairstyle for a long time, change¬†can be shocking¬†and it’s perfectly normal to be startled.¬†On the bright side, unlike Rapunzel, your hair probably did not turn brown and lose its power.

2. Cry a little if you want.

"I thought nothing could be as bad as red hair, but green is ten times worse!" - Anne Shirley

“I thought nothing could be as bad as red hair, but green is ten times worse!” – Anne of Green Gables¬†by L.M. Montgomery

It’s okay to miss your hair; it was a part of you. And, like Anne Shirley, it’s okay to shed a few tears. After all, you were promised a “beautiful raven black” and given a sickly green; that is a serious disappointment!

3. Be prepared for others to notice the change.

"I walked in, asked if they bought hair, and what they would give for mine." - Little Women

“I walked in, asked if they bought hair, and what they would give for mine.” – Little Women

Even if you cut your hair for the best of reasons, people will notice the difference. Sometimes this is affirming, but other times…not so much. There will always be that one Theodore (“Laurie”) Laurence who sees your new cut and blurts out “You look a little like a porcupine, Jo, but l like it.” Learn to take these awkward acknowledgements as compliments; it will help ease the self-consciousness of having everyone commenting on your hair.

4. Accessorize and experiment!

Princess tiaras make the best accessories. :)

Princess tiaras make the best accessories. ūüôā

Yeah, your new hair may not be your best look, but there is a whole world of accessories that can make it more, well, you! Rapunzel totally rocks her short hair with the crown adding some sparkle.¬†(And no,¬†her hair isn’t perfect just because she’s animated…it’s obviously due to the accessorizing.) If headbands and clips aren’t your thing, try other styles (straight, curly, braided, etc.).

5. Take advantage of this opportunity to reinvent your style.

Mrs. Harris: "Is that all your own hair?" Anne (laughing): "Every bit!"

Mrs. Harris: “Is that all your own hair?”
Anne (laughing): “Every bit!”

Green hair wasn’t ideal, but Anne used it as a chance to exchange her girlish braids for a sassy short cut and, later, sophisticated up-dos. Cutting her hair was a turning point in her life, marking the end of her rough childhood and the beginning of better¬†years. Chopping off your hair probably won’t be as climactic as this, but it is still a chance for you to alter your¬†style. Short cuts especially can look both hip and vintage if paired with the right outfit! (I speak from experience on that.)

6. Remember that it’ll grow back…unless you’re Rapunzel.

"And then I'll brush and brush and brush and brush my hair." -Rapunzel, Tangled

“And then I’ll brush and brush and brush and brush my hair.” -Rapunzel in¬†Tangled

Unfortunately, Rapunzel’s hair did not grow back, but yours will! Brushing and brushing and brushing like Rapunzel might help it grow faster too. There are tons of ways to boost hair growth (try searching Pinterest!) but time is definitely the best remedy. Your hair will grow again and be as beautiful as ever. Meanwhile, Flynn Rider has a thing for brunettes and short-hair… ūüėČ

7. Be confident.

"My head feels deliciously light and cool! ... soon I'll have a curly crop that will be boyish, becoming, and easy to keep in order!" - Jo March

“My head feels deliciously light and cool! … soon I’ll have a curly crop that will be boyish, becoming, and easy to keep in order!” – Jo March

Fake it ’til you make it applies to this situation; if you act like you are comfortable with¬†your new haircut, others will accept it and you will get used to it. If Anne could make¬†short hair look good even after dying it green, Jo could sell her hair despite it being her best feature, and Rapunzel could love her non-magical locks, then you can survive and rock this hair crisis. Who knows, maybe you’ll start a new trend? After all, somebody somewhere was the first person to get a pixie cut and now they are everywhere!

I wasn't sure at first, but am starting to like my short hair! :) (On a separate note, I do not know how to take a good selfie...)

I wasn’t sure at first, but am starting to like my short hair! ūüôā (On a separate note, I do not know how to take a good selfie…)